Why Have You Forsaken Me?

I feel like I am at the breaking point. Nothing seems to be going right. My frustrations with every aspect of my life are at an all time high and I don't know what to do about any of it. I feel....trapped. I wish I could just run away for awhile, but that would probably only make things worse.

I went to the gym and that didn't even make me feel better - that usually provides some temporary comfort. Now, I really can't think of an outlet for my emotional state. It's just a big ol' mess.

There isn't one thing in particular that is bothering me - it's everything! I find myself feeling jealous of others for a variety of reasons- which is very unnatural for me. I opened a pandora's box and now I feel even worse. I wish I didn't know - as they say - ignorance is bliss.

I found out some very disturbing news about one of my family members and it is so hurtful, I can't even stand it. I remember when this child was born... it's just crazy. I guess all I can do is pray, but I'd really like to shake some sense into him.

I am sick and I am willing to bet a lot of it is due to stress.

I have this burning desire to talk to my sister. I lost contact with her, but I am sure I can find her. She is almost a carbon copy of me. I have only seen her twice, but I hope to change all that. I have always wanted a sister and I hope that we can be close. She lives on the other side of the country, which gives me a great reason to go to California.

I don't know what it will take to pull me out of this funk. But I hate feeling this way.